But this time not about weather I should go to Ny for one night or not, but about friendships. Who are really friends and how is it they tell you they are your friend?
Does friendship come from a certain kinship, understanding of life situations or growing up together or even a cultural connection? I know some people who have stated they are friends, yet they will never invite you in for tea, never invite you into any circle of other friends, make sure in fact you are kept with people who may seem just like you to avoid embarrassment.
Is it the way you dress, talk religious presence, appearance? Is your style good enough and can you financially do enough or are you too needy? When I grew up I saw most Norwegians were very friendly within their circle and they appeared to accept us as a large poor family. Boy the way those ladies dressed. I hoped one day I could dress like them, be as polished as they were, refined to a certain degree. Their nails and teeth, hair and everything about them just stated class. But I was a kid.
As I grew up a bit and esteem went down I was one to watch and listen, observe what people said and compared it to how they lived in the ways of friendship and who is good enough. Education also affects the way we could be accepted as good enough and yes, definitely it is how we all feel inside. But to be sure, if you do get invited to a dinner by a supposed to be friend and are seated within a circle of others, people who may dress like you, may have worked like you, have your same sense of humor; Be sure you won't be seated with those who have their nails done, who wouldn't dare say one word to embarrass, whose hair is in perfect place, and dress as if their clothes come from Macy's and your are, well your are about five years old. Why you're not their friend. So when you start wondering, stop. You're gut feeling is right. You'll probably still end up in Heaven or Hell, but the others? They'll be wearing Macy's angel gowns.
Maybe some will say I'm carrying this a bit far, but don't accept friendship out of pity, it sucks. Look at the old hippies. They had the right idea. Okay maybe too far with the sexual revolution, but sharing, preserving, friendship, helping one another was real, unconditional. Improving the environment was all real, and yes lots of people are real with all that too.
My point is just this, don't so easily accept it when some one tells you, you're friends, yet have very little to do with you if at all.
Life is short, make and have true friendships. You'll hear people say, oh I have a lot of friends, but would they give you the shirt off their back, their last dollar,( I Know, stupid) a place to stay, buy groceries and deeply be there. I know these things are extreme, but it happens and can put you in jeopardy, so weigh and measure each situation, each friend, and money; how important is it? I have learned some very hard lessons because of being impulsive, and would still do most of it all over again, but what I would change is putting some aside for emergencies, like my old Jeep going on fire. Also make sure if you do get in a jam, pay it back, no matter how long it takes and no matter how it is given.
Now go look at Doozybags.com-buy a few thinsg so I can go to Ny for one day-e mail me with any questions at all. Doozybags.com or at doozybags@aol.com
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