Cheating Spouses/Partners

        What is it that makes someone cheat? Ego? Of course. They think they'll never be caught, too smart, and so much better than who they're with. They think they deserve to cheat, that it's someone else's fault. Sure someone else, , no matter who, pushed you into cheating. They will twist and turn everything into, this was your fault; If you didn't yell, if you had my clothes ready, if you fixed yourself up, if you had my supper ready and so many more excuses.

     The best excuse is when they may want to get back together which is really for financial reasons and so they can cheat again is : It didn't mean anything !   I believe strongly anyone who has such an ego as to cheat is basically saying, "you're not good enough for me, I had to find someone else".  Of course it meant something ! That's just another lie. How many lies will be told and how long will they go on? Lies will go on as long as there is a connection, as long as he or she is grooming you to take them back. That may take months or a year but slowly they will wear a person down trying to prove they've changed. The only thing that changed is, their looking for someone else to cheat with.

         These people feel they have a right to cheat and yes will do it again and again. If the couple comes back together the cheater will think, Ha! He or she believed me, I can do it again, because he or she took me back which in their egotistical mind feels, the partner or spouse just isn't too bright and must really need me because they can't get anyone better than me. This is the internal message they send themselves which again gives them permission to cheat.

        There are all kinds of reasons or excuses people cheat and as adults, they may have individual reasons to feel it was acceptable, it was expected, and things will be okay again. No, it won't ! Every time that cheating person goes out the door, you will wonder, who is she or he talking to, why is it taking so long, what reason will he or she give when they do come back from "the store"? Oh the line was so long, the cashier messed up, I was stuck in traffic, I didn't have enough money. Excuses to call a new cheating partner ? TRUST ! That word no longer exists with cheaters. They cant be trusted, wake up!

       Are children in the picture? What reason or excuse will you give your kids when they find out and they will because there is always someone dying to tell what a rat that cheater was/is! Mainly people tell and talk because there are kids to think about. Some well meaning person will tell because they don't want a best friend to be hurt any longer but to get on with life with a truly all around good person and partner.

      Other kids will hear adults talking and pass along what they heard to the children of the cheating adult sounding like this: Did you know your mom or dad had a boyfriend or girlfriend? That's why sometimes they don't live together. Can you just hear that now? Adults talk and so do kids. They copy, mimic what they hear and do, especially when a parent says, go play.

       Two adults cheating?  Why? Go live apart. Be up front and divorce. Don't stay for financial reasons.. Kids involved ? Cheaters should have the guts to tell the partner or spouse, I have a problem, but the person who doesn't say that doesn't have courage, but does have an ego so big they know almost with certainty they'll talk their way back in and they'll act like a new, better, happier person who has learned a lesson. Watch out! They're  lying to themselves and to the partner /spouse, so how much collateral damage are you going to take? How damaged will you allow your children to take and will they, then do the same as they are learning. Be good to yourselves and your children. That's what you all  deserve.
        

Doctor/Produce Bills-Blue Zones

       Inch by Inch I feel my jeans aren't as tight as they were a week ago. Grocery shopping has taken on a new meaning. I can buy a few turkey breasts, frozen of course, a bunch of apples that I never buy already bagged, pears which are great for you, and any other fruit and vegetables  that I know I will use fresh, and not waste. Buying frozen vegetables I also do with frozen blue berries, a few bags at a time
    The idea is eating better saves going to the doctor, as you are now healthier. You don't have to live in a BLUE ZONE to create a Blue Zone life. Blue Zone living is eating what grows naturally, move naturally, faith and friends/family. Sounds easy? It is, but not at first if you're used to eating like I was. too much pizza, eating out, ice cream, convenient store stops for coffee and whatever.
    We all can use to improve our faithful living. It does help as ell as a circle of friends and family. Choose those friends who think and eat and live like you do. Move  naturally means, you don't have to join a gym, but sure if you want to, do. Stock up so you're not tempted to eat out or buy quick meals from a convenience store. Good Luck...oh I almost forgot....those doctor bills piling up, the pharmacy costs,  and endless trips for the doctor and pharmacy-will just about disappear when you live a Blue Zone life.
Blue Zones come from areas where people have rates almost zero of cancer and heart disease. They are usually hot areas where fruit and vegetables are plentiful. You can buy what ever is in season, and you can also grow your own, even in apartments, on fire escapes, back yards, community gardens. Seek and ye shall find:)

A Jewish Dream

      I know ! A Jewish Dream ? How weird is that? I'm not even Jewish, but who cares.  So here it is: Suddenly I found myself in an apartment or house, couldn't really tell and i Was a teenager again wearing penny loafers which I did wear as a kid, and a long print dress, which I never wore. My hair was shoulder length and more curly at the bottom and I wore bangs. I never had bangs except as a five-year old.

     Well inside this home was gathering of a lot of people, all in their mid twenties to late thirties and me. Someone was missing, the old man. I didn't have any idea who the old man was or his relation to anyone yet. I walked around the people, looking and listening. Everyone was drinking, what they were drinking I couldn't tell. Glasses were clear. It was crowded and so much chatter was going on. Then the old man came in.
       He was so slender, wore a dark suit and shirt. He had a hat on and took it off when he came in. He was stooped over, but not sing a cane or walker. He was shaking his head and nodding, looking about. I went to him and asked why he was gone so long. Hands up he said, look, why would I want to be here? This is family ? We walked and sat at an old wooden table. I asked if he wanted something to eat. He took out another round hat and placed it on his head. He said, no, I cannot what they  have on plates, that every hand gas touched, so unclean.

      He asked me if I had a candle. I went to my room-oow I had a room-took out a candle, matches and gave to the old man. He lit the candle and said a prayer for family, old values and traditions. He took me to the refrigerator and showed me how the food was all scattered and then a hand reached around him grabbing lunch meat off a tray. The old man said, see, unclean. A man standing at the sink came to us and said hello dad, I'm happy you're here. Why said the old man, what is here for me anymore? look at what you have done to our Jewish family, traditions gone, dress gone, values gone, food gone. Have you forgot? The son looked sad, walked to the people in his home and asked everyone to leave. As they trailed out, he returned to his father and said, I'm sorry dad and I woke up as I was walking away in my dream.

Muslins, Alpine Brooklyn, Options Follow-up

     Regarding my prior post, I take nothing back, however on Face book someone said, they pray for five minutes, let it go. Well that;s fine if that was all that it was about, but it's also about taking advantage of your religion and the fact that many are afraid of radical Muslims, so no one does anything about them blocking     a sidewalk so no one can pass. What will happen if they want to pray in front of your place of worship? What will happen when your child goes to school with a bible and not allowed to have it but a child of Muslim faith can not only bring the Koran, but stop to pray on his prayer mat? AMERICA, In the name of all that's Holy to us, GOD, JESUS, THE HOLY SPIRIT, Stand up, Stand out and hand over your HEART SHOW who we ARE, a UNITED STATES of AMERICA !
    Lutherans, Jews, Catholics, Pentecostals, Baptists, Menonites, Pray like you nver prayed before, because thats all you may have left!

Fear Of Christianity

       Last year I had a child in an alternative school. This was an exploration by the district to see where a child belongs who has so many issues, along with having autism. They are the experts I was reminded as we have now passed over a year with him being in too many schools, and too many programs, but he knew as long as I had hope so would he. Here is where God came in.
        I told him at the start he can pray before school, pray before bowling, pray at meals and before bedtime, pray anytime he wanted to and even in school. We bought many Christian movies which he loved, having barely been exposed to religious education prior to living with me. He wasn't sure about God, if he believed in him or not, had all of the same questions many of us have and the biggest one was, "how do I know God is really real, I mean how can you prove it he said to me."
        My answers were things like, look in the mirror, we are all miracles simply by being born and it progressed from there. I don't think a scientist  way back when could have created birth, sleep, waking up and all forms of  life in general. So he started to pray and would ask me to pray for him, would whisper in my ear at the bowling alley, "will you pray for me ?"
        Now it comes to this alternative school. I bought him a cross and yes I was worried about the chain, but it seemed a teacher was more worried about what was on the chain, that symbol, that shiny cross. He was proud of it and I did warn him, some may tell him he has to remove it or hide it. He asked me what to do and I told him to do what he thought was right. He asked what if I get in trouble and I told him, you won't be in trouble at home. He came home that day with the cross tucked inside his shirt. His teacher told him it would be better if he wore it inside his shirt, and more which he didn't understand, so no one would see it. Political Correctness? Bull! It was FEAR .

      He didn't want to have an unhappy teacher that day so he did as she suggested, and he came home disappointed.                               What is the FEAR???
                         Is the fear that it's contagious? if so, then that's something I would want a whole school of misbehaved kids to catch.  Here we are the land of the free, ---with restrictions. Sundays were days of open door churches, now  too many are locked, destroyed, abandoned, sold to other religons and or communities. People will go in and steal instead of praying, all fears churches have, but the faith is the biggest fear. Christianity in many homes was right up there with the law. Do wrong and you will be punished. Now it's wrong to simply show you're a Christian.
          Yet other faiths can close down a NEW YORK CITY street, now want their faith acknowledged in schools and have come to this country, this country which has an open heart, but they, yes they are trying to take over our beliefs and believe it or not-this all started with freedom. Madelene M Ohare's freedom to fight prayer in school, fight for something she didn't believe in, fight for something she was afraid of. So if we had one woman, one atheist woman able to take prayer from schools, what do you think people from another country will do? Imagine if their laws applied here as they are trying to accomplish in other countries?
                                                                                      They are trying to enforce their religious law in other countries because they are AFRAID of CHRISTIANITY. Look what is done to people of the Christian faith who are visiting and helping in other countries !!!  Look at London, who "they" are trying to enforce the religious law from the country "they" left !  Christianity should not be feared but embraced. I bet many of us wished old Madeleine she was alive now and we can send her up front to "them" and she can join "them". All because of FEAR. I have one last thiing to mention,
                                  "ONWARD CHRISTIAN SOLDIERS !"

    

Churches, Contentment, and Wanting More

       On the way home today I heard a guy named Jeff Manion? It was a Christian station which I put on at times too hear more about another side of things going on. So today's topic was of course about being satisfied.  A question was asked of him concerned how would he answer when people ask, how can you talk about being satisfied, you have money, a big house, cars and don't have to need or want for anything. His answer to me seemed to be out of both sides of his mouth, yet I appreciate and understand what he meant-in a way.
        Manion said, I wasn't always in the state I'm in and yes, I have big church who is very giving to those who work for the church. But when I was much younger and struggling my wife and i tried so hard to find a way to still give, even knowing we couldn't afford it. Having three kids at the time his wife ended up being a stay at home mom and finally when she went back to work they were able to enjoy more in life. Okay, so is that telling me they wanted more, and weren't satisfied in what they had? But here he is telling others to be satisfied. He also wants you to buy his book.
        Allowing your self to be called a Christian opens the door for all kinds of critics, myself included. So that means when a person is a Christian and say they'll call you but instead ignore you, it's okay because as the sign says, "I'm not perfect, just forgiven". Cop out? Excuse ? Should I remain satisfied because some who said they'll call didn't, and not be upset, not say, I knew it and on and on, only making the issues bigger and bigger inside my head.
      How many times have you called, e mailed, passed along a message, only to not receive any kind of reply-but according to good old Jeff, you should be satisfied to be treated as a non person. I give up. Someone  said to me a while ago, I knew you were expecting...and I said no, I wasn't expecting anything. I'm sure you know the rest, don't expect, you won't be disappointed, but I made it sound easier, saying I know how busy people are so I never expect. But I really never expect because I don't like the outcome, especially of those who are in such positions that you almost put faith in them to answer, reply, respond or even tell you, don't bother me, go to hell, but just ignore?
      Hey it's all good. I'm satisfied because I think I know people pretty well, the more important you become, the less others are.
     JEff Manion as you climbed your ladder of success, I only wonder why you wanted more, and more. Why weren't you satisfied?

Lonely Teenager, A Poem a day...

   Lonely Teenager

 

He walked with shoulder's slumped down

 a Hoodie, now known on his head

He seemed to stand out more than others

yet felt like he was dead.

 

She was different than her friends

who teased her all day long

they said she never really knew

how to, sing their song.

 

They said he never was quite like them

that he looked funny too

and he even talked weird to people

but he was just lonely, like you.

 

They said she wore her hair so long

 and she walked her kind of gait

so they never bothered to ever know

her inside, her love of faith.

 

Next time you see a kid so weird

and doesn't seem like you

take the time to be a friend

That's what really counts too.

 

Look inside yourself, in the mirror today

look past the eyes you see, your clothes for the day

look past the friends who are just fake, walking on popular street

and take another look at those, who really don't want to compete.

Look and look again

Be honest with who you are

Open up the palm of your hand

Get to know the person, see the shining star.

It Only Takes You

       How much we have or how little we have, we have a lot if someone loves us, if everyone has reasonably good health and if you haven't recently lost someone, then you and I have a lot.  But if any of these things affect you or someone you know, then what do you do? What?
       I don't know what really but I do know those who have a real serious faith do much better than those who don't. How do we believe someone is in heaven when they didn't lead a heavenly life you might ask...well, maybe because they had a heavenly heart. Only God really knows.
     Right now I know a man who cares for his uncle's needs in many ways and the uncle is in his eighties. This man is fighting cancer, yet he runs, walks, golfs and who knows what more he's doing. The nephews is so proud of his uncle. That's also faith. They just never quit.
        Now there are hungry people, and people who simply need a friend. Just be careful how you approach them. People have pride and don't like charity. Yes, I know pride goeth before the fall. Haven't we all tripped one time or another? Still there are also people who are lonely, lonely in their own family and those who are so wealthy they become cold hearted and sometimes the poor are as bad, due to pride, but find a way and not because it's a holiday, but because we are human.
        Know too that many people do not have any religious affiliation at all, don't believe in God at all or a higher power. It takes one moment of friendship,one small miracle, one birth, one saved life to show that miracles to come. That works the opposite when someone dies especially a young person. How do you tell a mom or dad and more that there is a purpose to this, much less God had a hand in it? You don't. You let them grieve and talk out as they need to, say what they feel and be there, for  a very long time.
          Remember if someone loves you, even if they're not physically close you have more than many, so be more than many to just one person, any day of the year. Here's to you Victoria and Samantha !
 

Les, Miserables-Hugh Jackman, Sensational, Spiritual, Voice and....

       He was so much more. As a rule I don't care for many musicals but while at the library yesterday I rented two movies for two bucks, total. See the library has it all.
       Only know Hugh Jackman for his fang like Wolverine character, I was overwhelmed by his part in Les, Mis. Russell Crowe is a good actor but they could have done better as his voice was barely okay. Jackmans voice was not only professioanl, but done with such feeling, leaving you wanting more.
       In this, Hugh Jackman gets nineteen year in prison on a chain gang for stealing bread to help a woman with child eat. Caught, he suffers immeasurably. Finally getting released he is on parole for life. He has to show papers anywhere he tries to live or work and finally one day  he enters a church where he is fed, warmed and gets a good nights sleep.
       But he decided to leave, with the silver from the church. Outside waiting in the night was his prison guard,( who stays on Jackmans heels throughout) played by Russell Crowe. Brought back to face the priest, the forgiving priest also offers him a pair of silver candle sticks, telling the prison guard he gave them to Jackman. When Jackman leaves the sanctuary, he rips up the papers he is to keep for life, travels on and in eight years becomes owner and respected by a community but not that same prison guard, reassigned.
     The singing goes on with so many wonderful songs by Jackman, as he enters into different travels and situations.  Jackman rescues a young girl, only to have her die and he then raises her child, learning what love is, real, giving and unselfish love for the first time.
      I don't want to say more. This is a movie worth watching but be sure to have tissues and someone you're comfortable with crying-or watch it alone. If ya need a good cry and reminders about faith, giving, standing up for your convictions, you'll see a little boy who does just that along with Jackman.
     By the way, I had a fifteen year old teen watch it with me. He didn't have to, could have left, but watched. At the end, I said nothing, but he said WOW!

I Am Who I Was Born to Be !

    

 As I sit here and write I am listening to, as I have been this last half hour, Susan Boyle.
  Though I may not know the answers,
  I can finally say I'm free
  If they're questions let me hear them
  I am who I was born to be...

That is my favorite part of the song. Today I received the Proof to a story, a children's story that without collaboration from Tom Kastet and Ron Myrnes, it would not have come true.

Listening to the music and realizing the completion of  a dream at my age, took a few hours to sink in, and when it did, I found myself overcome with memories and emotions. You know as a kid when you're told things and it continues into adult hood, you accept that maybe they were right. Somehow this very little book tells me a different story; Finally I am who I was born to be.
Not just a creator of stories because the people I know, know how I can make up stories for kids, but I am a writer, a mother of the two best kids on God's earth, a grandmother of one and one on the way, a cousin to a few terrific people in Norway, a believer and  a friend.

Now I know the answer.
I am Thankful.
Don't ever give up!

Faith, Beliefs, Food, Kids, Health, God, and Life

       Years ago there was a song titled, What's is all about, Alfie? I seem to think about that a lot or maybe it seems that way at times. We all go through periods where we, think deeply about things and then we have the what ifs.
Have you wondered what your life is all about? I do sometimes and talked that over with my son. His comment was, if we think too long about our purpose or what's to be our purpose, we don't enjoy life. That makes sense to me, and I thrive on common sense, yet to be honest I am very impulsive and my lack of financial common sense has gotten me into trouble at times.

     Common sense is how I catch kids in lies.  Common send is how I now eat once again, plant based. I started yesterday. A boy moved out of my home Friday and I knew I would go back to Gods way of eating which is plant based, however he also put animals here for our food too. That was a time when pesticides weren't "spread" so wide. This too was a chat with my son, how when I was doing Forks over Knives, I was emotionally happy, and happier each day. But it's pesticides that have to now make me decide what meats I will eat as I love meat and don't want to do without. I will research free range beef.

    There is a new reporter who I will look up now, stopping as this is important, BILL CURTIS ! I just remembered.  He even talked about that when he was interviewed about his beef.  He has a ranch in the Midwest where he lets his herd roam free, God's way, which is how it was in the beginning and no I wasn't there. So how would I know you ask? Look into when pesticides came to be. Check out cancers, when were they first know and what population of people have cancer and heart disease LESS than anywhere else. That information you will find in The Blue Zones areas. Look it up.

      Look at kids in this generation and a few generations before. What makes them happy or I should ask what makes them think they're happy? Electronics, drugs, money, alcohol, freedom, lack of responsibilities, bullying and more along those lines.

     Then look at other kids, kids who eat differently, whose family values are to do for others as you would have them do for you, who have spiritual connections, who do for others, take responsibility, education is important, money is when they work for it, ethics, respect of adults and property, the law, being there for friends, not being part of bullying and they don't have to have name brands and what other kids have. They live within their means and the means of the parents.
     So what's it all about Alfie? In that story, the young lady learns it's about love, not money, not all of the things money will get you but love. Love covers everything. If you have love of family and faith, you will respect yourself and others to start with, and from that the other things which have values will follow.
    Next time your child asks you about life and why we're here, let them know simply, for each other and to learn.

Mormons, Missionaries and Mitt

       I remember the first time I told my brother I attended a Mormon church. He did a high pitch sound saying, ahh, no they're a cult! Well I looked into his church and it appears to be along the same lines.
      As a person who grew up in New York I felt fortunate in some ways to have a father who was a bigot. I'm sure you'll understand this parents. It's when you tell your child no, and of course they want a yes, so they explore, break rules and seek out the why of the no. That's what I always did, secretly of course. My best adult friend on my block was a man who was Jewish, and my best male friend in school was Italian Catholic and I remember even younger than those days, about ten years old a man who was Spanish and looked just like Zorro on TV, well I was attracted to him, and yes at ten. But he was kind and always when not working sat on his stoop, and smoked, talked to a few neighbors. He would let me talk for a little while, but never sit, said it was improper and then make me cross the street and go home. I was to be afraid of him because of his culture according to good ol', well my male parent.
    That's how "I" went all of my life. If people talk against it, I want to know why personally, not to simply believe. So to the Mormons. My experiences were positive and I used to feel a certain jealousy knowing and seeing how healthy they are, and how they live their life. No smoking and alcohol is out. So what some say and sure that's fine, but can't we at least take the positives and put them to good use. I know plenty of Christians who smoke and drink. Check out the missionaries. How many Christian kids and other faiths do what they do?
    Get off your high horse, I am not knocking Christianity, but believe in it. Yet when the Bible talks of one faith, I see why. We need some of the other religions.
I used to wish I started out as a Mormon.  I loved the Jewish faith, can't say much about Catholics, just ill informed as well as with other religions except the Seventh Day Adventists, another positive way of life and faith. I lived with the Amish as a very young kid and wished then to stay, a very peaceful way of life with much faith as the number one reason to live how they do.
     So now we come to Mitt. So what if he's a Mormon? Go check them out. Invite the missionaries to your home. Sure they'd love you to switch, but that's part of the reason for the work they do. Don't many faiths try to have people swim to their side?

What I want for Christmas

       A royal blue truck two seater I say

       with a big box out back, hauling hay

   or carrying a storm door, won't fit in my trunk

         saw on sale a set of twin bunks

         I'll even take red a color I love

       I knew as kid from the stars above

     I'd see a red flash , was it Santa I saw

    or all of my daydreams left at the door

So I still wish and sometimes pray

for that great big truck coming my way

But I am happy to have what I do

 the love of my children, my only two.

I'll go a step more thinking about

a truck I want to not be without

yet I know who am I to deserve such a thing

but should it happen, 4 ever I sing

This is Christmas a season for giving

for me, for now, I thankful for living.

One more small note as I leave this page

on this Friday a week away

comes the reason as most do know

the gifts of giving should help others so

they start a new year with hope to grow

a new sense of faith and seeds to sow.

Merry Christmas Everyone, Everywhere...

P.S.    Please leave the truck outside my door