Sexual Assaults, Men's Perversions, Life in Prison at Least !

       It's about time more women are coming forward. Before I go further, yes, I know women have done it too, and I'm not brushing it aside. I don't care if it's a man or woman who is the abuser, they should equally spend life in prison.
        I've been told by someone close, well if a guy serves time, gets out, then Megan's Law is really unfair because the guy already served his time. By putting him on this list he's being punished all over again-yet he went on to say in his opinion, death would be better because if that happened to any of his kids, he'd want to kill the guy.
          Here's why I feel life in prison and I bet you can guess this before you read my post;that abuser has changed a life or lives forever! So why shouldn't the abuser get the same and worse. If I was in charge, drop him off in the middle of the ocean for fish food, yet I don't want to poison the ocean.
So put them in prison with yellow suits. Yes, of course yellow! These people who sexually abuse others are first cowards and second bullies who threaten and intimidate.

          Now we have a guy, a senator Moore, Roy Moore from Alabama who was recently accused and his precious Christians are standing with him. WHY? Because of proof, because they've known him forever!
          Pedophiles do not molest children, rape others, grope, feel, use porn, sell women and yell hey look at what I'm doing! Smart people are so stupid. How the hell can they even ask for proof and yes I know there are false allegations at times. Look at Tawana Brawley who did what she did because of Al Sharpton, a male in position who took advantage of a kid because he wanted political attention. I wonder if he ever paid his taxes ?

        Remember Chris Hansen who had a show years ago exposing pedophiles ? Yup, fired for cheating on his wife if I remember right. Hes now back on TV, Older and fatter, BUT that doesn't distract from the following: That show exposed men of all ages, all faiths, races and careers.  There were Catholics priests, Rabbi's, Teachers, ministers , coaches, and on and on.
That didn't stop anyone from continuing to molest, rape, and sexually assault!

       Finally too we have so called celebrities that many don't want to believe. "oh how could he do that, he's such a a nice guy". There all nice on the outside, just like a book. People in the position of power don't necessarily have to be bosses, coaches etc. Those pedophiles are also fathers, cousins, brothers, grandparents and spouses who cover up. Why do they cover up?They take the easy way out, they may have to support themselves, embarrassment, disbelief (but they really know) its just easier which makes them worse than the abuser, they colluded, they allowed it to knowingly continue.
        Parents keep talking to your kids, doors stay open, two go to a bathroom in a movie,, keep spaces between others in movies. Overnight trips, sleepovers? Hell NO ! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S IN SOMEONES MIND! Prison for Life, no exceptions!

       

It Can Happen Here Too !!!

        While sewing my  latest American made bag I am listening to the news and then I hear what I know can and may very well happen here. I think something like it did before. Look what happened to the housing market and who was in office then ?
    So, how would you like to be allowed to take only 70.00- that's right seventy dollars a day out of your bank, your own money? Well that's what's happening in Greece. Buy safes, not one but two, fire proof.  The interest you receive from knowing your money is safer than in a bank is worth it. Maybe even a safety deposit box in a bank, but I don't know how that works. If we go into a serious recession, the banks, whose CEO's are loaded, may just lock down your safety deposit boxes too.
    How do you stop it? VOTE ! Study your candidates. I just heard Chris Christie stopped a teachers raise or their pension, something like that. Check for yourself. So techers are protesting to make sure as I heard, "so people really know what kind of a man he is". ARE THEY KIDDING ?
      The only way you really know how a man or woman is, is if you live with them and many times not even then. Study them, look at their history, voting records. I am not affiliated with a party so I check independent. I hate when people run party lines then vote party lines. These people who run for office know who votes party lines, so they don't give a crap about you. They care about those who don't vote and minorities, which really mean, no longer do they care about the all American person to put it in a nutshell. YOU no longer count!
     Save your money!!!

Josh Duggar, Family, Perspectives

          Like many it was horrible sad and feeling of being conflicted about this. To me there isn't any excuse for child molesting. People who do this are first cowards as they do it in secret, bullies because they threaten and the worst of the worst when it comes to criminals. They change what should have been a different outcome for a child. Child molesters are usually people we know, fathers, brothers, sometimes an aunt, babysitter, best friends and those in power who we put trust in, Catholic Priests, Lutheran minister, Jewish Rabbi's School coaches and counselors. I worked in mental health and in a group home there was a teen who was confused by another female who was bi sexual and trying hard to get this very pretty and innocent teen to go her way.
      She confided this in a counselor at a mental health agency who ended up taking advantage of this young girl. It wasn't long before her confusion in her Catholic faith and her family telling her how sinful it was, that she took  a gun and killed herself.
     Now we have a young man who when he was a teen took advantage and molested his sisters. The family thought they took care of it by doing what was right. They went to the law !!!  WHO does that in families?   Mine sure didn't. They swept the garbage under the rug and because of the nasty family secrets that mothers keep, how many other kids are molested? YOU can't keep an eye on two kids all the time, never mind nineteen. But then the parents took them to counseling-again did what was right !!! Creating a paper trail, they believed helped heal all the children. So now the whole fairly is punished because of what one boy did, a boy. I am not excusing this at all. Kids experiment with those closest to them, but this is also a problem when parents don't want to openly talk about sex.
    Imagine if they did nothing, for just a few moments. Josh Duggar would continue to do what he did and yes I know-maybe he still is or maybe he will repeat. This is a stain on the family. The whole world knows.  Who is the bastard that leaked it-what were they paid to continue to cause harm to the girls ????
People will look and stare at these girls and wonder "which one was it is it that one?" They will watch to see the effects of long ago, Any wrongs they might do, any misjudgements they may make will be blamed on being molested.
      I hope who ever leaked this is shamed. I hope he or she made enough money that they sleep at night and more than anything, I wonder did that happen to them and is that why they didn't care about the victims in this.?  Let me tell you I am looking at this from a totally different perspective and if it was the father, I would be the first to drop him off in the middle of an ocean, put the needle in his arm,. flip the switch. Those poor girls. Hey just  a thought, recently an old friend stated those who accuse usually do-so to the one who exposed...are you molesting? BTW, I know that isn't all true, but to a small extent it is. Those girls-did you really ever think about them as you collected a big fat check? I doubt it. When people really care, it's never about money.

Jealous Teacher ? Ego ?

       What would make a teacher tell a very young student that another person can't be smarter than her, just because she a teacher? Vanity ? Ego? Both I suspect. I have a little guy that I take care of and we have had so many conversations about anything and everything. One chat was about school and getting an education so he asked me about my children, especially my son. I explained how my son had something called principle and one time walked off the soccer field raising his voice to the coach that the couch continually picked his son to start, gave more credits when he knew good and well that many other kids were much better especially two other boys on the team. My son shed his gear/clothes on the field and walked off to a local store, called me, asking me to bring pants and shoes and  a shirt. I was very proud. He stood up for others against someone who has power. Of course he was off the team, but things did change a little after that.
    My son ,now a man always challenged truth in education and life. He has a genius I.Q. and was invited into Mensa. Sure he was arrogant as a teen with people especially in High School. He knew teachers were wrong in much of the information and so he would challenge that. Who wants to be shown up in front of a class of students when they are supposed to have all of the knowledge. But each and every time, he offered to show them he was right, to prove they were wrong. They were as arrogant as he was, telling him to sit down that he wasn't the teacher. My son's response was usually, anyone can can teach when they don't know what they're saying,
    He quit High School on the day he turned eighteen, as a matter of principle. He told me, mom, I will graduate, just not from Spring Grove. It was a matter of, principle, character and ethics. The assistant principle was let go because of his behaviors with female students. This was a man who came after my son saying he was playing hooky, walked through my home as I left the door unlocked looking for what, I don't know, maybe my underwear. I no longer trust to leave my door unlocked. My son was with me that day at a doctor's office. Still I was fined because this is a good old boys club type of town.
   Well skipping to the chase, he had an accident before graduation in  a school he chose, a mall school of all thing which was for kids with behavior issues. I offered to pay to send him out of district. He didn't want it-said it was all about principle. So he has an accident, brain surgery and with a few days wakes up, and is taken for testing. The doctor comes back and asks, do you know your son has a mind like Einstein? Yes I did, The doctor said, well he still has it.
     So my little guy takes some piece of this to school, tells his teacher I said, my son is smarter than she is. She told him _according to him- no he isn't, not possible. Insecure? Why can't he be smarter? Why can't anyone be smarter than teachers? I'm sure this will rub many the wrong way, but think about this. Have you been invited to Mensa at the age of twelve? By the way, he never wanted to join and he never wanted to be in gifted classes, but the last one I wasn't in control of that so he went, but didn't like it. Too many people with higher I.Q.'s are snobs, just like those who don't have that same level of intelligence. Basically we are all just people living in a world and should leave ego's and attitudes at the door. Finally, who really cares? It's what you do in life to make you happy as a person, not your so called class, not positions, but integrity and character. Isn't that the principle of it all?

School's Out Education in 4 Summer

       Years ago I lived in Oregon and there was year round school in my area. I loved it it as I think most stay at home parents did. But if you're a working parent outside of the home, it just doesn't seem to jell, but it can. Year round school helps kids keep their brains trained to education, as ongoing and steady. That two week break in between is helpful and enjoyable. If that isn't better than having school from September to June, nothing else is.
      If nine months as it seems to be of school is so great then why is it parents are so relieved to have kids back in school after just about five or six weeks at home? Because it's too much togetherness for many.
       Think about it this way: day care centers, jobs, traffic and more can be lessened but making the same money and less congestion on highways. Why? Because year round school will be different in every district or every county. It can be worked out. After all, look at those who run businesses, schools, hospitals, and more. If they're smart enough to do that why can't a better system of education be figured out. Think about vacations too. All of the retirees leave to go places in September and October because kids are in school so let's screw with them :)
      Our Children need to be educated year round and it's up to us as parents to do just that. Kids will complain... and we'll hear them moan and groan oh mom or dad, it's summer, why now ? Tough. Keep their brain trained to learn while it's young and curious. Do your job too. Listen, really, really listen to what they ask and say. Get  a few books and lay them on the coffee table. They'll look, they'll be curious. Even put one that you really want them to read in the bathroom-if you have two bathrooms . Lay a book on the back seat of the car. They'll pick it up, but make sure they don't bring a toy along or any other distraction. A book is better than being bored on a car trip.
       Teachers are there for our kids in so many ways that we forget about and yes they get paid to teach, but not to play psychologist, nursemaid, referee, and friend. But they do it anyway, so let's appreciate that, not take education for granted as kids do when they're young, but help out. Education is a right, but it' also a privilege, so pitch in. You'll be happy with the results.

Schools & The Teachers Within

       With so many disorders with children how do we know who is telling us correctly or not? I know a child who is labeled autism because the doctor wasn't sure what to put down. He isn't retarded, but he is developmentally delayed by about five years and he does have serious anger issues to the point of property destruction. Of course he's not afraid to destroy things because adults are not allowed to hand out a good old fashioned spanking. Seriously neglected and very small for his age he is such a sweet kid-until. Until he refuses to do what's told such as work in school, so how do we handle these kinds of children who by the age of fourteen are so much out of control, they graduate to throwing desks and chairs, cursing at teachers, walking out of classrooms to play their games.
         School and the teachers within take so much crap from these kids and they get together too just as we adults do to see what works and what doesn't, but with the kids, it's more about, how much can I get away with before I'm transferred or have to move and lose friends? So with all of the labels they have, how is it they are smart enough to know just how far to push? Because the labels are BS!!!
   Those type of kids will not push just anyone around and cross boundaries, but only the adults they know well, such as teachers and parents because they are also cowards. They know if they pull the same crap with a male stranger, that guy will put him against a wall and smack his cowardly face into oblivion.
    So what do we do when they are so young, really young and start out causing problems in school ? You give them problems at home. You lean hard on them, as hard as you can without making yourself sick. Take away toys, no video games at all until the school year ends. No treats, no outings and yes I know this punishes the parent too and anyone else who lives in the house, but the child has to grasp at some point, NO excuses for bad behavior. I'll close with that.

Spring Grove Gardens Pa.

    We are so close to Spring time and planting new and fresh gardens so why are our schools not being utilized to benefit all of the communities which pay taxes ? Spring Grove schools has let their buildings be used for Church services, which mean it benefits the community, yet when it comes to prayer in school, separation of church and state, their are issues so why not really benefit a whole community ?
   Plant and pray if you want at the same time. I am not at all against a church using the school, as a matter of fact it's great so why not spread the word nutritionally too ? We live in a world whee we have so many people in need, people who take all the time, kids, so many in trouble. River Rock is a building in the Spring Grove school district in Spring Grove PA.
   There are also many kids in school who are on probation. Why not take those kids and really put them to work and learn at the same time ? Give credit where it is earned ! We have meals on wheels so take some of the fresh area gardens growth and spread it to the elderly and sickly.
   Again I love the church and people who do use the school but, yes, always a but  as I have been told who will mind the store in summer when school isn't in session? Oh and there's insurance too. Well if insurance is a problem, then there should be gates up so no one can walk through the school grounds, and they have tennis classes on the grounds too. I also see people walking through the grounds during the day when I go to pick a child up.
   Come on Spring Grove. You are educators ! Why is it you haven't figured out a way to have Spring Grove Gardens with all of that tax payer property? There are many retirees who would love to meet in the" Gardens of Spring Grove High". Now doesn't that sound nice ?
  What about the" Intermediate Garden" ? That could be for beginners with hands on helpers, small children with mom mentors, or dad mentors. Remember the phrase, put on your thinking caps. COME ON PLANNERS, EDUCATORS, PEOPLE IN CHARGE... look past the hours that school is in traditionally. Life is a learning experience, so let other learn and go out into the world as they grow and are able to say, when I was a kid, my school had a garden almost all year long and we learned how to plant, to nurture, cultivate, weed out, and we ate, played, delivered and were as one real community.
   Look ahead now so children can look back later and say...I really loved that school !
         In closing remember, Gardening is for every age, every level, everyone's brain. It doesn't limit or discriminate, but it does leave people happy. Church Gardens anyone ?

What Causes Autism ?

          Kids who are diagnosed with Autism are considered to be on a certain spectrum, such as Aspergers or PDD and more. But what we don't know is a cause and that's not unusual as we don't know what causes many disorders and illnesses. So what can we do to prevent as much as possible and what can we do once a diagnosis is made?
        First lets looks at the futures of kids with Autism. Each and every one is different. It depends on a variety of thing. What kind of parents do they have, levels of patience, stay at home mom or dad, insurance and supports. Supports such as family, doctors, therapies, education, outside social interaction and play. Play is so important.
      Pre -Plan your pregnancy-take care not to smoke and drink alcohol as well as eating natural as much as you can, plant based foods. It all helps in having healthy babies and we know too, many moms do this and still have a child with birth defects and other illnesses. Check our neighborhood well to see if you are near an old dump site, a water treatment center, anything even close to that. New Jersey has sold homes without revealing what surrounds them only to have people become ill, because of a smell that is making sure people do not open windows and are getting sick. There isn't any law that tells the new home buyer it has to be revealed.
      Planning a future for a child with Autism. Have structure and a regimen that you know or feel you know you can stick with from as early an age as possible.
Take care of yourself if you are planning. Buy toys that are sensitive to touch. Play calming music. Do not start with electronics-this is my opinion. As much as you can live a normal life from day one.
    Investigate your school supports systems. Here we have what is called The Amazing Kids Club-and it is amazing and they also have FOAK=Friends of Amazing Kids which are families who stick together throughout all kinds of traumas and dramas, needs, babysitting, and so much help you wouldn't believe :)
    Use family, friends and church friends as well.  Introduce them from the start so they will never be seen as strangers to a child with autism.
    Food. Food Food
     Sleep, Sleep Sleep both are so important for the whole family. Eat as natural as possible, no food colors, no preservatives. The best medicine is Farm Grown and on the table. Shop outside isles more than inside. Use diapers not pampers if you can. Give baby rub downs, lots of love, touchy hugs, continued so they will expect it and not be afraid of it.
   DANCE. Put music on and dance so again-they are used to it, happy sounds !
   You have to plan now for later. If you wait, so will your child. This is all partly my opinion and partly my experiences. As an added note-God Bless all of those Special education teachers.
    

The Secret Sauce

The Secret Sauce

 

The day goes up and the night goes down

Life keeps going round and round

Good days we have and bad we hold

but what we need is a pot of gold.

 

What's in the pot is to be found

all kinds of spices from every town

teachers and preachers, add to the mix

of the secret sauce, a bag of tricks.

 

 Kids live a life that no one knows

 in and outs keeping on our toes

good days they have  and hopes arise

but then explosions, a saucy surprise.

 

So we all pitch in and then we see

how we can work it through tastefully

a pinch of this, with a smile of that

The Secret Sauce, I tip my hat !

 

Thank you Ms. H.



Special Ed. Teachers need Bonus Days OFF !!!

       Everyone, please understand this. Our schools have become more and more like personal care settings in many ways. I have watched over the years generations of kids in trouble or at risk as it's now called, end up going to alternative education schools. These are usually kids who just think it's okay to do what they want to do without any regard for anyone else. They come from all kinds of homes which makes it difficult to pinpoint the whys. Why is this kid acting like he's owed all of the special treatment? In my opinion, it's due to societal changes, such as two parents working, no more spankings, electronics and entitlements. In addition to all of that is the blame game.
      Kids blame others for what they have done because they hear adults do the same, so the thought pattern is learned. Finally kids don't get out often enough to play, parks, zoos, gyms,throw a ball around, climb trees and interact with their own parents.

      NOW MY BIGGIE and maybe I should have started this way and sorry for that. I easily get off track.
     Lets talk a little about children who need SPECIAL EDUCATION SERVICES. Those are children who have a wide range of mental heath issues as well as mental health combined with mental retardation and in some situations physical limitations.
      Here is what Special Ed . Teachers put up with every school day from many of these children of all ages. We'll start with personal care issues: Body Odor, hygiene such as not brushing teeth, clean hands, rather unclean, same dirty clothes which smell-and that usually happens because the child's issues are so deep mentally it's too hard for mom and dad to argue with every single morning, so the teacher gets to put up with it.
     Education : Homework, Writing down the assignment itself or not doing that, forgetting an agenda, forgetting books, papers, refusing to do it, stating I forgot all the time, simply stating I don't have to, stating because I want to, throwing items in class, kids who cry, have bathroom accidents, outbursts on any given day at any time which disrupts kids who are trying so hard to do what's needed, kids who  individually learn on different levels-all in one classroom.
     Putting it all together : Meetings to start with, during and on going, e-mails to parents, phone calls to make schedules work and the paperwork? Many children have an Individualized Education Plan, but while that sounds simple, it take a few teachers and more to put it all together. Sometimes it involves the school psychologist and other emotional support professionals. Then another meeting when that child decides to erupt again. Questions such as , what can we do to improve things for this child. Is another eval needed? They do what it takes to make kids feel as average as possible.
     These Special Ed teachers put up with a lot more than an average teacher and this is not to take away from them, but why do you think we don't have more Special Ed teachers? Because it's not made for everyone and as people are deciding careers and think they want to work in Special education, well first they have to do internships. Then they find out,-uh oh. Maybe I'll stick to traditional teaching.
      In my opinion Special Ed teachers should all have bonus days off and be paid for such. I personally know two such people and I'm sure there are many more who care as deeply. A bonus day happens when it is repeatedly shown that this is a successful teacher and who decides that? I think the school with inputs from parents. If the school refuses, with proof, parents can over ride. I guess I am partial to this because I have seen different operating systems in different schools. I know I may not be right in the how to's, but BONUS DAYS for those great teacher should happen at least once a month.
   

South Western Reg. Police York County Pa.

     Today I brought a young boy, just a new teen over to meet some officers of this fine police department. I already knew just how good they were, and I knew how well they did and do their job as I have had them to my home many times over the last twelve or more years.
     I made this appointment ahead of time and Sergeant J. Stalcup returned a message with  what basically meant, happy to help. Many kids who I work with have an attitude that the police are there just to bother them, and that's usually because the kids bring it on themselves. Never have I known an officer to just harass a kid. It's more like to help a kid, especially children with preconceived notions.
     Through all walks of their lives children meet the police in sad situations and it easier to blame the unfortunate officer coming into that situation rather than those who cause it.
                                        *********************
     This visit today, Sergeant Stalcup invited my little teen into a small room, and if I wanted to I was allowed to go in but I decided this kiddo needed to see, learn and listen first hand what areal man is like, what a police officer is like, man or woman. Officer Stalcup, after speaking with this child, returned to where I was, just outside the little room and gave us a tour. This kid had a dozen questions out of his mouth before the officer could say hello, yet patience on the officers part was obvious to me as an adult and as a parent, but also as someone who works with children, mainly boys.
        Sergeant Stalcup  during this tour introduced us to two other officers, one whom I again forgot her name (sorry) and the other officer, Officer Harrison who I also knew from coming to my home.  I remember his stance, his kindnesses and his way that silently said, it's okay, I'm here now. There is also a look of compassion. This was definitely a trip down memory lane. While this was my first tour, this was not my first time at South, Western Regional Police Dept. Yes, kids. However anytime any officer came in contact with any child I worked with, that officer, those officers came with respect, patience kindness and experience. Within that they brought character and integrity.
          This tour with Sergeant Stalcup was more than a tour, it was an invitation to the future for a child who previously may have thought he would never want to be a cop, an officer of the law as his very, very young memories which I cant go into are very different than many.  Stalcup spoke to him like a mentor, a friend, an authority figure and teacher. He did indeed teach this little guy a lot today. He taught and showed him the workings of what it takes to keep a community safe. He made eye contact, shook hands, and made him feel he counted. After all isn't that what most of us need?
      At the end, after a  feeling of a puffed up chest by making the car siren go off, turning on the lights, using the loudspeaker and more questions and answers, we headed on our way. In the car I asked this child if he thought differently now of the police. He said, oh I told him I never blamed them-sure. But with more in depth conversation I asked him if he honestly felt like he saw another side of the police officer at work as he was used to. Well he grinned a little and talked about all he saw, but more important all that he heard and he said, yeah, I really like that.
     So to the South Western Regional Police department, I thank you for opening your doors and hearts, giving in ways that many don't know about, all of the time and times your officers take at my home to talk to kids. As sad as that is in a way, I am thankful it's you at SWRPD who do come to my home when needed. Each time you leave, every single child has said the very same thing, Hey that cop was pretty cool! Ya know what Stalcup, Harrison, Greene, Matthews,  and on and on, you are all kool !
    Thanks,
    Nancy
     

Special Ed. Teachers

       How easily we forget, unless that is we have a child in a Special Ed. Class. We forget that our taxes don't pay enough for these special teachers. Sure our taxes are high and in some areas too high, but it all comes out in the wash. I am thankful to live in America and don't care what other countries have to offer as none compares to my country.

      Soon, school will be out and even more so we'll forget about the patience, the quality, the stress, the love and kindness and education behind these special teachers. So how about showing them, and I know many people don't have money to buy a gift. But think about this; Do you have a special talent you can share with a class to take some stress off a teacher for an hour. What about materials such balls, paper, glue, small scissors and cloth materials. Go in for a morning of teaching as an "expert" in your hobby.
     Here's another suggestion. Is someone in your family a chef, an auto mechanic, a carpenter, an electrician, a plumber or some other skilled profession. Ask them to offer a car check-up, or some kind of repair which takes the place of money, but if you are able to, buy a gift certificate to a nice restaurant. First find out if that teacher had kids, so make it a family time. You don't know if they can get a sitter, so what about a nice night or Saturday afternoon at a local family eatery? What about it? Show your special Ed. Teacher he or she is special too.

Encourage your kids to...Educate about...

    Ride a bike, Play the Piano, learn sign language and anything else you can think of, but never discourage.
     I know most schools now teach kids basic sign language, but to learn it completely as a translator and have a degree in it will take them anywhere they want to live. Kids should have two at least, forms of education, academic and vocational.
      Do you remember wishing, I wish I could play the piano, but never doing it? I do. Any instrument is great to learn. Someone gave me a Piano Cd one year for Christmas and I play it at least once a week. My son played the drums and my daughter played the piano. Both had lessons and both stopped. I think it was because I could no longer afford it, but whatever reason a child's stops, encourage them to pick up something else, like writing, drawing, painting  and things that don't cost much money.
     Some kids if old enough can get a job and pay themselves which they will appreciate much more as having earned it. Think about kids with special need who do wonderful things and what it takes many to lean one small thing.
    We really do have to get back to old ways as some say and think. As adults think about how your child spends their time. TV, Video games, head sets? What should they be doing instead? The park, a gym, swimming , creative writing, exploring, learning, library, cooking, cleaning, taking care of pets, helping in the home or helping in general. Teach your children, and they will come back to it when you least expect it.

Who IS Melvin ?

        A couple of days ago my foster son came home, went outside quickly to use his PS Vita, then came back in to ask about going to his friends house. "What friend", I asked. Well he told me, Melvin. I started thinking, who was this Melvin kid ? I don't remember hearing his name, so as I scrambled my thoughts on names of his friends, he went to and came out of his room, winter jacket, hockey stick and a smile ready to go out. Again he asked, "so can I go?"
Well where does he live, and the kiddo answered as he pointed at the same time, right across the road in that yellow house.
      Again I was thinking about the family in the yellow house. I knew them and as he suggested he wanted to play basketball, I knew they had a basketball hoop and one of the boys had Downs syndrome, but I couldn't remember either his name or his older brother's. So I just said well okay, but be careful crossing the road. He couldn't hold it in any longer. "There is no Melvin, I just made it up", he said.  He enjoys doing this and I told him then, I will get you back for that, always testing me.
      Later That night I e-mailed the school and asked if when my kid went to the bathroom the instructor could prep the other kids who are few, to welcome the new student, Melvin, when he returns-from the bathroom. Then I called the guidance counselor, left a message explaining and could she call him Melvin.
   Well the results were this : The male teacher who is a kind of specific instructor only said to him, so what's with this Melvin stuff? What a duh he is ! Now the guidance counselor passed him in the hall and said, hi Melvin. He did a quick neck breaking turn of his head. YEA for guidance counselors ! That other guy, the one is specialized? No life in him at all. Life is short have some fun. Melvin left for school happy this morning. More on Melvin later.

Those Little Footsteps...No More

       The silence of one is something I enjoy, but I most enjoy a bunch of kids, laughing, being silly, taking them out, making crafts, and simply letting them enjoy being a child. For almost a week I've had two young guests, siblings and you know how that is. Siblings are interesting and fun. No matter how different, they are the same in the important things in life. But I don't mean all siblings.
       I've come to learn about a silence of two, no words to express that except wish to be one again or have a bunch of kids running around, yelling, laughing, playing make believe, reading, and so much more. Kids who have a wide variety of interests are so easy to please. Kids who don't have many interests lack motivation, so it's up to us as parents to try and try again to motivate.
      My time this past week with these little guys brought a refreshed interest. I heard appreciative thank-yous'. I saw facial expressions of fun, laughter, interest, curiosity, sadness, daydreaming and had questions galore. What a pleasure! They talked and asked questions about my children, places I've been, they've been, and where we could go. They talked about things they read, discoveries they've made and their teachers, what they've learned that day. These little guys love their teachers, and how they're taught at school. I wish their teacher's could read this.
        When I drop one brother off at school, another brother and I wait over a half an hour for his bell, and we sit and watch. One by one they drive into the parking lot, open the doors and bags in hand walk past us. He waves. They give him a big smile and wave back. We talk about who each teacher is and he never stops talking, but in such a good way. He's interesting, not just rattling on. He describes them and what they offer to kids. He knows them well.
          The other brother is a big time reader, yet both are. One reads more and he talks too. He talks about his characters and then compares people he meets to having similarities  to some of the characters. He also asks me a lot of questions. He is so cute as is his brother. So individual are they, that they both becomes favorites and  a person just wants to do for them, take care of them, nurture, hug, play, take them to parks, let them stay up a little bit later and just stay little. These little guys give , I think much more than they get. They just don't know it yet. Children of God, definitely, and where ever they are in life I hope people always treat them as treasures...because they are.
           Those little footsteps...I miss them, but hopefully they'll be back:)
        

Turn a Dreary day into a Cheery Day-Brooklyn

       It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring...remember that one. Well I woke to rain this morning and felt good. Somehow it reminds me of those fun days in Brooklyn when we'd see a rainbow and sunshine on the other side of the street.
We were allowed to go out in the rain and play, and no one got sick.
       Sometimes it meant playing marbles on the stoop,cards or jacks and other times it was just fun to sit and talk. Moms and dads were doing what moms and dads do and so were kids. Most of the boys would still play stick ball in the rain, just hang out, or if they were bored would come and tease the girls.
       When we'd talk it was about what we wanted to be when we grew up. That's something I don't hear from too many kids today. Maybe it's just me, but I do hear it from much younger kids about ten and under. So what happens as kids get a little bit older? Are they hearing too much dismal talk from adults, not always parents?
         We talk about too many things in front of the kids that instill negative thoughts and feelings and yes they do need truth in their lives, but not so much truth and not so early. Just because your life stinks now, don't pass it onto the kids. Go gently into their hearts. I keep hearing how resilient kids are;really? Why are there so many addictions, suicides, depressive kids on meds, kids killing kids. I could go on but it's too depressive.
         I check myself as a parent many times and ask what if I was them and try to think of another way to say or do something, affordable or not. Weather it's about weight, education, peer pressure (the worst) religion, sex, or dating we have to be very careful. They're are so many creeps out there just waiting to take our kids. No, I don't mean children and youth. I mean gangs, perverts, drug dealers, clubs and more. Be honest with them and don't let them learn something about you that's so horrible from a relative. You know how that goes. Relatives want to be smarter than their siblings too, so what do they do? They let themselves become available to your kids to talk and then the subject comes up....
      Oh I remember when, well did your mom or dad tell you when they got smashed or tried pot? Did they tell you about the friend they had who they went to parties with and...see what I mean. Many adults just want to look better in a kids eyes. Don't let that happen. You remain their role model. Remember what it was like when you were their age and think about an answer and how it will affect them before you open those lips. You thought this was going to be cheery? It can be.
    When your child comes home from school today, don't use the typical line, how as your day, ask something different and unusual? Want a cup of tea with me? Hot chocolate? Ask how they made it through the day and yes, you'll get a look and maybe a, what? What do you mean how did I make it through the day? Same as always I guess. So as mom or dad your answer can be as simple as, well I just wonder sometimes, well a lot of times how you handle teacher attitudes, stuff like that.  HOLD IT PARENTS! 
   If you say kids attitudes, your child will resent that and say why does it have to be kids, why can't it be teachers? Some teachers do have attitudes, but if you get to where your child is now, chances are they'll open up more, might say well mom I have pretty good teachers but this one "kid" always agitates me and I'm not sure what to do. I feel like I want to just punch his lights out...so now you're on board, and remember how your parents answered a question you didn't like the answer to. Find some middle ground.
    Today make it a cheery day when your child comes home, not dreary, not one of accusations but listening and sharing. Don't get physically too close(leaning into them) but give some space, talk and walk to a comfortable area, like the sofa-they'll follow. Try hard not to take anyones side, but look for solutions, and look for options so your child has other choices he or she may not think about. Okay people, I am gone now. Later.