Mental Health's True Stigma

       How do you care for your mental health, or do you even think about it ? Your mind, it's health needs the same amount of attention as your physical health does. So why do so many "smart " people ignore it and knowing they have a problem with what's happening with their brain ?
       The mental health STIGMA isn't the same as it was years ago. Then, because of lack of education and compassion, understanding and personal knowledge as if someone in the family was ill, it appeared as if people were "just nuts". Most people, every day people didn't understand that mental illnesses was something caused by a chemical imbalance and in most situations is genetic.

       Right now, be honest with yourself and look at your family. Do you have a parent, aunt, uncle, grandparent or sibling who truly has a mental illness?

         How many times have you heard, it isn't mental illness, so stop saying that, he or she just needs to grow up, get their act together?. How many years has that been the disguise? That's just what it is, a disguise,a phrase mom or dad uses to hide the truth from others, others who probably already know yet are hoping mom or dad, or the sibling with an illness will face the truth and do something.

          I don't mean do just anything like join a gym, join a church, but I do mean do something such as get involved in a community that offers mental health help, weekly or daily therapy. If you do nothing here is where the true stigma comes in, doing nothing. Your real self shows every day in your words and actions and don't think those you work with don't know it. They do. Behind your back they are talking, "what's wrong with him/her ?" They higher ups will be careful in placing you in certain positions. Believe it or not, you're replaceable. I don't care how good or great you are. Younger and smarter are coming up right behind you.

        You can't hide forever in your uniform, the way you dress, wearing a collar, playing sports, shiny shoes, a suit/dress or even how much academic knowledge you may have. It catches up and eventually becomes public. The STIGMA is knowing and doing nothing. One day you will have a full blown breakdown in public, an office, a parking lot, traffic, a classroom, a bank, wherever and not understand why this is happening to you. Here's why its happening to you....you let it, your family let it happen in that disguise. Smart?  If  you ignored, and disguised it this long you probably need long term therapy. NO? That's the Stigma

Brooklyn Donuts

        No, I don't know of any donuts called Brooklyn Donuts. What I do know is they somehow taste better when you're with family and friends. Brooklyn favorites people talk about all the time, knishes, pizza, Italian dishes, polish Kielbasa, Egg Creams, deli food, mostly at Katz's, burgers, mostly at The Salty Dog and I'm sure you have your own list of specialties .
       
       It's all about atmosphere and being with people you want to be with, not people you're obligated to be with or feel obligated to be with. Times is so short and yes, of course being soo much older, I know that well.

        Last night talking to an old friend in Brooklyn we probably talked for an hour and said can't wait to sit down at a local diner and have coffee and cheesecake, or for me rice pudding. My daughter recently bought me a container of Rice Pudding which is my number one desert. Then ice cream, then cheese cake.. I love my time with my daughter and her baby boy, and of course some food specialties.
Sometimes she'll pick me up a sandwich that has coleslaw on it, oh boy and yummy! Once in a while, maybe more she'll pick up a Mcflurry with double oreo's .  Sure the food is great, but it's more about the people you live with, visit, and share with. Enjoy.

Cheating Spouses/Partners

        What is it that makes someone cheat? Ego? Of course. They think they'll never be caught, too smart, and so much better than who they're with. They think they deserve to cheat, that it's someone else's fault. Sure someone else, , no matter who, pushed you into cheating. They will twist and turn everything into, this was your fault; If you didn't yell, if you had my clothes ready, if you fixed yourself up, if you had my supper ready and so many more excuses.

     The best excuse is when they may want to get back together which is really for financial reasons and so they can cheat again is : It didn't mean anything !   I believe strongly anyone who has such an ego as to cheat is basically saying, "you're not good enough for me, I had to find someone else".  Of course it meant something ! That's just another lie. How many lies will be told and how long will they go on? Lies will go on as long as there is a connection, as long as he or she is grooming you to take them back. That may take months or a year but slowly they will wear a person down trying to prove they've changed. The only thing that changed is, their looking for someone else to cheat with.

         These people feel they have a right to cheat and yes will do it again and again. If the couple comes back together the cheater will think, Ha! He or she believed me, I can do it again, because he or she took me back which in their egotistical mind feels, the partner or spouse just isn't too bright and must really need me because they can't get anyone better than me. This is the internal message they send themselves which again gives them permission to cheat.

        There are all kinds of reasons or excuses people cheat and as adults, they may have individual reasons to feel it was acceptable, it was expected, and things will be okay again. No, it won't ! Every time that cheating person goes out the door, you will wonder, who is she or he talking to, why is it taking so long, what reason will he or she give when they do come back from "the store"? Oh the line was so long, the cashier messed up, I was stuck in traffic, I didn't have enough money. Excuses to call a new cheating partner ? TRUST ! That word no longer exists with cheaters. They cant be trusted, wake up!

       Are children in the picture? What reason or excuse will you give your kids when they find out and they will because there is always someone dying to tell what a rat that cheater was/is! Mainly people tell and talk because there are kids to think about. Some well meaning person will tell because they don't want a best friend to be hurt any longer but to get on with life with a truly all around good person and partner.

      Other kids will hear adults talking and pass along what they heard to the children of the cheating adult sounding like this: Did you know your mom or dad had a boyfriend or girlfriend? That's why sometimes they don't live together. Can you just hear that now? Adults talk and so do kids. They copy, mimic what they hear and do, especially when a parent says, go play.

       Two adults cheating?  Why? Go live apart. Be up front and divorce. Don't stay for financial reasons.. Kids involved ? Cheaters should have the guts to tell the partner or spouse, I have a problem, but the person who doesn't say that doesn't have courage, but does have an ego so big they know almost with certainty they'll talk their way back in and they'll act like a new, better, happier person who has learned a lesson. Watch out! They're  lying to themselves and to the partner /spouse, so how much collateral damage are you going to take? How damaged will you allow your children to take and will they, then do the same as they are learning. Be good to yourselves and your children. That's what you all  deserve.
        

Rev. Joe and The Road Crew

       A few years ago a young man named Kevin Griffin passed away at age thirty-nine of AML, a cancer, also know as leukemia. Kevin left behind a nine year old daughter,  and his father died racing across the street to see him, the night before Kevin died.
       Kevin worked for the MTA in Staten Island New York. A few years ago, Kevins mom and I went to that bus station on Staten Island to talk to someone about a book I wrote which would donate a dollar of every sale to Cancer. We were waiting, and waiting after being told, I'll get the boss, but no one came. This happened a total of three times, and finally Kevins mom cried asking me how can they be so disrespectful to not even say, not interested, but to keep us standing in the hot sun, a disgrace.

       So I'm still trying and have about 45 books, sold one, gave away three or four. I wrote The Jelly Bean Forest and gave all of those away to kids.

      Here I am asking, imagine asking to buy a book? I grew up in Brooklyn and many have similar stories. This book is about a great crew of guys who are friends, because friends, and Aunt Sandy who still lives in Brooklyn, is Kevins mom and is a wise cracking care taker of this crew. They meet all kinds of obstacles to help people being thrown out on the street.  I'm sure anyone can connect with many of the people in the book, some are real. You decide whats true and what isn't.
    Please pay through paypal to doozybags, 13.99 plus 2. S&H I hope to be in Brooklyn in about a month but for now, please take time, buy then ready this book that is set in Brooklyn, Staten Island and Long Island with a grave digger. Enjoy

Leftists leave carnage behind in DC

            Who is paying for the destruction? I sincerely hope the IRS holds onto any refunds of anyone who was arrested, holds welfare checks for months and holds anyones cash benefits of any kind if they were caught and arrested. Why do taxpayers have to keep paying for rioters.
     SUGGESTION:  Police need to prepare with hoses loaded with red dye and or mace in order to catch rioters so they can lock them up, check out backgrounds, and grab any money by attaching wages, benefits, IRS income refunds, homes, autos etc. Its time we the PEOPLE hit them back-where it hurts !!!